Identifying and Living in Alignment with Your Core Values
A core value is something you orient your life toward. It's what matters to you at the level of "this is what makes life feel worth living." It's not about how you naturally are or what you've been taught is good. Values are chosen and felt, not inherited. When you’re aligned with your values, decisions feel clear, and energy is high. When you’re not, you see it in friction—second-guessing, misalignment with others, and decisions that don’t hold up over time. Not living in alignment with our values triggers us.
This exercise will help you identify your core values.
We have created a worksheet to complete the exercise described below. Use this worksheet. Or complete it with a pen and paper using the steps below.
Core Values Exercise:
1. Select. A list of values appears at the end of this article. Print it out or save it as a new document. As you read through it, identify (circle/type/write down) all of the words that feel like a core value to you personally. If you think of a value that is not on the list, go ahead and add it. Feel free to circle a bunch of them!
2a. Group and Refine. Combine all similar values into groups. If you have more than five groups, eliminate the least powerful words until you have no more than five groups. For example, in the chart below, fifteen words are divided into five groups of values based on the similarity of the words and the behaviors they align with:
2b. Narrow. Start editing the list by removing those values that are not as critical to you. First, narrow the list to 10, then continue narrowing it until you reach your top 5 values. Feel free to replace a group of three with a word that is not already there but captures the group. An example of what might come from the grouping above is shown in the chart below.
3. Here are your core values! The top 5 values are now your core values. Sit with them for a moment and consider how they resonate. Not resonating? Go back to the drawing board. 🙂
4. Bring Them to Life. Now turn these values into actions. Add a verb to each value. For example:
Live with abundance.
Seek opportunities to make a difference.
Encourage others to appreciate life and the difference they can make.
Inspire others by leading through teamwork.
Act with a positive perspective.
5. The Power of Why! Now put a “why” for each of these values. What matters about this value to you? For example, the value of “Living with abundance” could look like:
Live with abundance.
Why: “I want to live with abundance because it would allow me to look at the world through a lens of what is possible, not fearing for my financial security, and not repeating the pattern of growing up with a scarcity mindset.”
Seek opportunities to make a difference.
Encourage others to appreciate life and the difference they can make.
Inspire others by leading through teamwork.
Act with a positive perspective.
6. Apply the Learning. Take note of your values and when they show up. When you are triggered, what value is being stepped on? When you are in deep resonance, what value are you leaning into? When you face a difficult decision, how would your core values influence your decision or action? How could your core values help you shift your mindset?
Developed by Weissman Coaching & Consulting, drawing on Barb Carr’s “Live Your Core Values” exercise from TapRooT® and Brené Brown’s “Living Into Our Values” exercise and List of Values
